Going to a Bar for the first time #175

It was an usual Wednesday except the fact that I was standing outside my office building with some of my colleagues after my shift. I am always super exhausted after my shift is over. As I don’t share a common route with any of these people, I never have a company while returning from office.

“So what’s the plan for Friday? Are we going for movie or not?”, asked Jatin.
“Yes, we should… but what’s there now?” – Mohit.
“Preeth told me that we should totally go watch that movie…”- Rapha
“Punyi will not come for sure… “- Tany

While they were discussing about their weekend plans I thought to myself… Is there a more boring and disgusting human being than me in their mid 20’s? On Friday, after getting back from office I would buy some grocceries and order dinner. After dinner, I might watch YouTube for some time(might get extended to 3 in the morning) and then sleep. On Saturday I would sleep to skip my breakfast. I have to get up by 12 to avoid wetting my bed. Lunch is served around 1:30… After lunch I would again watch some random videos and shit and sleep. Then I would wash the 2 buckets of dirty clothes which I piled up through out the week. I would clean the room and make dinner. On Sunday, I would apply coconut oil in my hair and wear a charcoal mask on my face. I would leave the oil for atleast 4-5 hours and then wash my hair. The clothes that I cleaned on Saturday would be dry by then, I would press them, fold them and keep them in the cupboard… I would have my dinner and start stressing about Monday. My major focus remains on getting an ungodly amount of sleep during the weekend. Also I don’t have many friends, who would make plan with me.

The discussion concluded too soon, I was not listening to any of it… even though I would love to hang out with this guys but I am not part of their “squad”. Unless somebody is asking me to join their plan, I am too shy to ask for it. They were counting the heads and suddenly Rapha asked me, “Cookie, would you like to join us? We are going to watch this movie on Friday…”
“Okay…”, I said. Immediately after reaching home, the boys booked the tickets, made a whatsapp group, added us and shared the details. On Friday, we had to literally run for the movie after our shift.

The movie was okayish. To be honest, I don’t like to spend 200 bucks for a below average Bollywood movie. I was starving, when we left the movie hall.

The next destination was a night-club. When Tanya asked me that afternoon if I liked clubbing or not, my answer was plain… “Not sure, never been to one.”
That was true… In 24 years of my life I had never been to a night club before. My idea about night club was, it’s a crowded place with loud music, people go there to drink and dance. There was nothing that would entice me to go there. Loud noise, too many people- are not my thing. Also I can’t dance.
But I had to eat something after the movie even if I don’t drink or dance. I thought that I would just sit in the corner and see my colleagues enjoy from far…

Tany, Priti, Mohit, Jatin and I entered the club while Rapha went to pick one of his friends, Punyi from her house. Damn man! I was right about the loud music though, it was so loud, my heart started racing as soon as I stepped inside the club. It was quite dark and crowded, the air was heavy with the smoke of cigarettes. Jatin went forward looking for a table but no luck. Rest of us stood as the entrace. After waiting for some time everybody decided to mix in the crowd. I had no other choice than sticking with them.

Even though I had a little bit interest in having a drink, I restrained myself. Tanya and Jatin went in front of the bar counter to get the drinks, I was standing still just behind them, not sure what to do. The dj was not the very best but people were too drunk to judge that. Everybody around me was too desperate to enjoy the time. I couldn’t understand why people were cheering to that shitty music. Rapha and Punyi joined us after half an hour or so. Everybody except me and Mohit got the drinks and we stepped on the dance floor. People must have cringed to death seeing me awkwardly throwing my hands amd legs in the air without any sense of coordination. I don’t know how to dance but it was equally embarrassing and painful to stand still surrounded by drunk people dancing. Slowly I started enjoying the music and started moving with the beat. I was still hungry, I just had half a glass of coke…

They were dancing in a circle, Rapha and Jatin had kept the girls close so that strangers don’t interfere. Rapha stepped on my feet for like 2 times. He was so apologetic for that! There was no food, my companions were least concerned about it, I realized. We danced and danced and danced. Everybody kept drinking. Surprisingly, Mohit did not touch drink that night, whereas Punyi who never drank before snatched the beer from Rapha and finished it. People told me before that Rapha doesn’t get drunk very easily but he was drinking recklessly… He kept a bottle in front of me while I was taking a short break, I didn’t even touch it. I was at my peak level of self control that night, which eventually helped me out.

It was around 12 when I felt that I needed to go home. I expected Mohit to drop all of the girls home because

  1. His place is near to mine.
  2. He is the only guy who did not drink.

Priti insisted on leaving as her over-possessive boyfriend started yelling at her on phone. Punyi had to accompany her, as they both live at same place. I would go with anyone who is leaving early cause it was already too late and my parents would be anxious. We came outside first followed by Mohit. Mohit didn’t leave though. Rapha, Jatin and Tanya had too many drinks… Rapha started calling all of us. First he talked to Priti about she should deal with her boyfriend… then he held hands of Punyi and said, “You girls are like my sisters, if there is any problem… no matter what… you call me and tell me.
Your brother will solve them… ” He turned to me, kept his hind on mine and continued, “You too, like my sister. Any problem, just tell me…” He kept on talking about random stuffs from office, he was swearing but none of them was targeted to any people, rather they were aimed to the things that frustrate him in general. For one moment I was afraid, for the other I wanted to keep my other hand on his… Nobody has ever said a thing like that to me before… drunk or sober. But I had to hold my feeling back, he was drunk, I wasn’t.

He was like an open book, talking his mind… Rapha has a soft voice for a guy, his voice became softer. He was blinking slowly and talking. I could not stop laughing at his face, he was so drunk and he knew it.

“You’re laughing…? I know I’m a little drunk. Don’t think me as your colleague now. I am a friend. And you should not tell these things outside.”

Then he turned to Mohit, he was standing right next to him. “Listen bro, do you see these girls? These are like my sisters… If anything happens to them, I would fuck the shit out of you”…
“Okay, okay… whatever you want”, Mohit was more embarrassed than Rapha. He was trying shut him up.

I left with Punyi and Priti. Mohit stayed back with Rapha, Tany and Jatin. They continued to drink and dance.

I used to like Rapha for a while but being called sister by him at the most unexpected time didn’t hurt to the extent to what I would imagine. It doesn’t matter as a sister or as a friend, if somebody genuinely is concerned for you, you should value it. I couldn’t stop thinking about it even after coming back.

Later we all met again, Rapha asked me how “sober” he was. I was excited to know what happened after we had left. I could not get details on that, Mohit was concerned about saving his friend’s reputation, he didn’t say even a word. Tany told that Rapha hugged her that night, when she tried to go, he held her tighter… “Stay…”, he said. Tany is also one of the girls who refered to as “sister”. I was burning like hell when I heard that… but probably I could’ve not controlled my thirst if at all he had hugged me. I have no idea what I would have done. This is why it’s important for me to be sober around him. I cannot allow myself to do such things. Rapha has a girlfriend. He has kept his relationship private but it seems to be a peaceful one. All I hear him talk about unlimited money and alcohol but never about girls. I don’t want to do anything to him that would make me feel embarrassed for the rest of my life.

There are a few things that I learnt that night.

  1. I was pretty wrong about night-club. I thought that I would never enjoy it but I did. Even if there was a resistance working in me for some time, I did enjoy a lot that day. I did not feel being “forced to enjoy things in other people’s way”. Rather I slowly got indulged in it.
  2. It was first time hanging out with all those guys, it was fun. I would love to experience something like this again.
  3. It was great decision to stay away from alcohol and getting carried away.
  4. These guys are not as responsible as I thought, Rapha, Jatin and Tany drank too much. I didn’t like returning with 2 other girls that late.
  5. Watching Rapha drunk af was an invaluable experience… something that I could’ve never thought of.

That’s all folks! Thanks for reading! 🙂

Post Author: Molten Cookie Dough

A typical Pisces person.

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