After moving to Hyderabad for work, I happened to have lesser interaction with my classmates. I do talk to 1 or 2 close friends often but apart from them nobody hears from me. I do know what my other friends are up to from their FaceBook, Instagram and WhatsApp posts but chose not to say a hi.
Last month one of my school friends called me after 3 years. Let’s call her Tsuki. Now let me give a brief intro to her. 😅
From 5th to 12th standard Tsuki and I studied in the same school. We used to take the same tutions and we used to return from school together. We have done a shit ton of things together. We got admission in different colleges after that and we had to part away. In those 4 years of college we met a few times during Durga Puja and other holidays. The main problem was my other close friends from school didn’t like her company. I have been in a lot of embarrassing situation because of my stupidity and Tsuki’s blissful company. I don’t want to bring those things up again. She has a habit of spilling tea everywhere so I chose not to share my personal stories with her after school.
Coming to the current time again, Tsuki called me on WhatsApp on the day I was attending a wedding invitation so I didn’t see her call. She left a text, ” I want to talk to you today. ”
I returned from the wedding and took a good afternoon nap. Tsuki texted me once again and I knew that I needed to call her. Don’t think that I ignore the people who give mw attention. It’s like I don’t want my insecurities get digged up by a childhood friend.
As I called her, for first 30 minutes she complained about many things including- I’m so careless and I didn’t keep in touch with my so-called friends, I’m so selfish to move out for job, I should really go back to my hometown as my parents have grown old and they need our care and love. To some extent I could agree on that. Then she started talking about herself. I asked about her love life. Then she started talking about this guy- Misaki. I don’t know why I want to call this guy Misaki in this story. It’s nothing to do with his looks or nature. About 3-4 years ago Tsuki sent me his photo asking how he was. He was just an average looking guy. She told me that he was her boyfriend and so on. Later that year I met with some other girls from school during summer. This girls were Tsuki’s friends as well but she wasn’t included in that plan. The things that I came to know about Tsuki and Misaki had no similarity with what Tsuki had told me earlier.
Misaki was not even her boyfriend at that point. Tsuki confessed about her feelings to the guy and he didn’t answer anything at all. They used to hang out together but nothing more than that. On the other hand I got a few texts from Tsuki talking about her new boyfriend! This all happened when we were still in college.
In the phone call, Tsuki started to talk about Misaki. I admitted that I didn’t remember who Misaki was so that she had to give me a summary.
She completely forgot the version of the story she told me before and went on. Tsuki and Misaki became good friends in college, later Misaki had to change his college for some reason. Tsuki realised that she had feelings for her best friend, Misaki. As she opened up her feelings to him, Misaki didn’t give any yes/no response to that. He continued to hang out with me and be her best friend. But whenever Tsuki wanted to know his opinion, he used to ignore it. Their friendship got better than before, they used to talk for hours, help each other in studies, occasionally giving gifts to each other. On Tsuki’s birthday, Misaki planned a surprise for her and gifted her his favourite book.I could feel how emotionally attached my friend has got with this guy.
Tsuki said, he was an introvert, he didn’t really express his feelings to anyone. Not even to his so called best friend Tsuki. She cannot think about going to cafè with her colleague. She thinks it would be counted as cheating on him. She is frustrated about the fact that Misaki kept silent even after asking him so many times. Now they live in different cities, they talk to each other at night for hours.
After talking to Tsuki, I really don’t understand why this guy can’t put things straight forward. If he doesn’t like her more than a friend what his problem is to say so. Tsuki has become so much dependent on him, she doesn’t know what she would do without him. I’m nobody to decide what they should do but I think when people don’t communicate properly that’s how it becomes complicated. Now Misaki might have been struggling to take a decision considering many other facts that would affect his life afterwards. I’m no love guru but I think we have no right to hurt a person who love us with falsehood. Yes, it can be the case that we may not be able to reciprocate the love somebody has for us but we should try our best to be honest and fair with that person.
I am a pessimist when it comes to such situation. I asked Tsuki not to stop herself from meeting new people. I told her to be clear about what she really wanted from that friendship and be mentally prepared. I don’t want to see my friend crying like a loser if Misaki says no to her in future. It’s been easy for me to talk like this because I’m single and I’m not in that situation. All this years, I have considered the things people do or I do that worsen a relationship. However, I think that love is still the most beautiful feelings in the world unless we twist it in our way.