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Despite all the meaningless awkwardness on the day I met Ritz immediately after my stupid dream, I managed to stay calm. We had one or two small talks and that’s it. That day I got occupied with work, I eventually I forgot about it.
On the very next day, Ritz had some work for which he sought Samaya’s help. Samaya is another teammate of mine. As the issue was a priority one, Samaya left her work and came to Ritz to assist him. I was also sitting nearby doing my work. I don’t know why I was feeling a little uncomfortable to see them together. It’s none of my business! Why would I mind then? I didn’t have an answer for it.
I found myself looking at them aimlessly once or twice. I don’t know if anybody else has found me too!
Later that day, black clouds covered the sky and it became dark as night at 1 O’clock in the afternoon. Our office buildings are isolated from outside world, you can only see what’s happening outside but can’t feel anything. Neither the sound, nor the wind, nothing. As it started raining everybody gathered at the window side. It was raining quite heavily accompanied by stormy wind.
To get some fresh air and enjoy the splash of rain, I walked through the corridor and reached an open air place that has a small shed. I stood beneath the small shed and filled my lungs with the smell of wet land. The sound of rain muted my inner noise for a moment, I was seeing how the trees were tossing their heads, how the rain drops were hitting the ground causing ripples in the accumulated water and vanishing soon. All of a sudden I saw Ritz was also standing there, enjoying the rain. After a few minutes I came inside with him discussing how nice the atmosphere was!
I am no practical person. If I was, I had never been talking about this in the first place. I won’t like it if I can’t stop myself before being noticed by somebody else. This would be the stupidest reason for hitting on a guy. In last few day many things happened, I lost some opportunities and Ritz got those. Our interests are in each other’s way, there’s no way those could be mutually exclusive. I don’t have a direct rivalry with him nor do I have a close friendship with him and out of nowhere a 30 second clip projected by my subconscious mind is seeking my attention! Damn!
That’s all from today’s 3 a.m. thoughts. xo