It was an amazing dinner with my colleague Keith on Friday night—much needed after a hectic week. Keith is senior to me at work but a great friend; we both share the same love for food. Whenever one of us has a craving, the other tags along without question. Exploring some of the city’s finest restaurants with him has been great! But I’ve noticed something about Keith: he always wants to pay the bill. Even though his salary is much higher than mine. It’s not about money—he just thinks it would be odd any other way!
Whenever I’m going shopping or something, it’s obvious that I will pay for my part. If I can’t afford it, I won’t buy it in the first place. Maybe on a special occasion someone can give me a treat or something really inexpensive but not on a regular day. Keith is nice and well-behaved. He paid the bill on our first lunch date, but later I made it clear that if we go out together again, I should pay for myself. At first he wasn’t ready to accept this, but eventually he did. Ladies, here’s my point: if you’re working too there’s nothing wrong with paying for yourself. Why should guys have to always foot the bill?
Before I finished my sentence, another question came to mind: What if you don’t have a job? My mom quit hers when she was pregnant with my sister and became a full-time mom. My dad was the only breadwinner in our family. We weren’t wealthy. I’ve seen Mom hesitate to ask for money when she needed something at times. So I always tried to make her understand, “Although you’re not going into an office, you’re doing something that can’t be measured in money.”
If your wife is a stay-at-home mom and you think she has nothing to do, remember the day she was sick or had to go somewhere leaving the kids with you.
All I wanted to say is, if someone cooks for their family or pays the bill, it doesn’t change their gender identity. Can we stop making jokes about this and start looking beyond gender stereotypes? Let’s support all the brave and beautiful people who are challenging norms to make the world a better place by breaking down gender barriers.
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